Cycle

It's here. My cycle

Breathe.

It does not get easier with time, with experience, hell! Even with success. I always know, I cannot shake the fact that this doesn't work more often than it does. (that's a sentence, right?)

I'm at the re's office. Every time I come here, I see someone having a bad day. Last week, it was someone fighting with the cashier about billing ("if you don't pay today we can't proceed with the extraction"). Today, it was some woman being directed to take a prescription ("but I don't understand. Aren't I cycling?"). Tomorrow, it will be someone and something else. I would not love working here.

I am insanely, crazily, obsessively worried about this cycle. I think it's because so much went wrong last cycle, and I know it's the last cycle my insurance allows. No pressure, ovaries, but get pumping.

They switched up my drugs this time. I'm taking f3mara, which is new for me. My clinic is a group practice, and some doctor wrote me a prescription without noting why. When I asked the nurse she shrugged and said "couldn't hurt".

Wish me luck