Saturday, April 18, 2009

Is it Friday yet?

I have nothing to report.

I pray. I plead. I try to remain positive.

And this has only been a week. (Not even).

I haven't had any possibility of going to acupuncture or anything like it.

After the transfer, I came home and vowed to stay in bed all day. But Spunx and babysitter had different plans. So many questions and interruptions. Finally, I came out and played with my child (and sent the sitter home).

Last time, I sat down with funny DVDs and laughed myself silly. This time, I could find nothing funny and even the funny stuff made me cry.

But.

But I played with my baby (who's now more of a toddler) and I smiled.

And I'm hoping.

I have the same ache on my left side that I did last time. Which means nothing, I know. And yesterday, I had breast tenderness. (Not that I have any today). Which means nothing, I know.

Maybe I'm asking too much. Maybe I'm greedy. Maybe I don't deserve any more.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

You do deserve more.

Familyofthree said...

Maybe I'm asking too much. Maybe I'm greedy. Maybe I don't deserve any more. This is NOT positive thinking!

Why are we as infertile women greedy? If we were fertile and decided that we were ready for #2 people would be ENCOURAGING IT! Stop blaming yourself for wanting more! Stop blaming yourself for wanting and needing more! Stop worrying about what the world at large may think--screw em' if they think this is anything more than a blessing should you get a second chance!

E. Phantzi said...

It's not about "deserving."

Bea said...

Sounds like the hormones and anxiety are getting to you... wishing you through!

And thanks for the article. Gosh, now I feel like running out and getting my thyroid tested, although I'm 99% certain I already did...

Bea

Somewhat Ordinary said...

It isn't about deserving because if that were the case the population would be a lot smaller because there are too many people out there that DON'T deserve it. You my friend deserve that and so much more!

Thinking positive thoughts!