Now what?

I'd been gearing up for my next cycle. Cleaning up my diet, taking my supplements, going to acupuncture and the like.

And then I lose my job.

Now, I have a small severance, and I have COBRA, so I can continue. I gave enough room on my coverage for one more cycle, and I'm approaching the cut-off for the age, so I should go for it.

But my options are (1) that this one is successful, and I'm running around looking for work whilst pregnant or (2) this one isn't successful, and on top of everything else I've got this failure.

I know I have to -- I'm a year and change until I'm uninsureable under NY law. So I have to. But it feels so damn selfish...

I'm sitting here in a St@rbu€k$, contemplating my life and charging my phone. Oh, and spamming my blog as I keep publishing half-baked thoughts.

Hi. How are you?

I don't want to be negative. I don't want to be sad. I want to count my blessings and look on the bright side and find the silver lining and what not.

But I'm a spoilt American girl, and all I can see is what I don't have. (like a job).

Here's what I do have: a husband I like and love, a child I cherish, friends who support me. That can't be undervalued...

Here comes a bumpy ride.

Btw: I'm here waiting until I have a job interview of sorts. Wish me luck...