Evil Post. Do NOT Read If You Are Easily Offended

So here's the bare bones of the background: My brother ("B") made plans to spend Christmas with H, Spunketta and I at our house. But he forgot to tell his wife ("R"). Who made plans for them to truck to her mother's house, and then refused to come to our house, and thus started a traditional holiday family feud. (You know the type).

Now, the fallout from the falling out will (most likely) be done and buried within a month or so. My brother is a jerk and this is not the first time that he (or R) have done or said something that hurt our (my) feelings/made me cry/etc. And we had a perfectly tense, lovely, negotiated dinner on a negotiated date at a neutral location.

And as I watched B and R interact, I (HERE COMES THE EVIL PART) wished infertility on them.

NOW WAIT. First and foremost, I didn't exactly WISH it on them. But having gone through IF, H knows a ridiculous amount of information amount me. He was the one tracking my cycle, taking my temperature, checking for fluids. We discussed all sorts of "miracle" cures (acupuncture, vitamins, d.h.3.a). Etc. And I know similar things about him.

R doesn't know B's inseam. (34, like our father). Or his waist measurement. (36, unlike our father). Or the fact that B hates (HATES) the short sleeve dress shirts R gives him each and every holiday. And, of course, the whole holiday kerfuffle.

And I didn't wish IF on them. Exactly. But as we sat there during dinner, and I saw the two of them interact (or, more precisely, not interact) I was struck by one thought: You could never get through IF.

Which I didn't think was "wishing" IF on them. (But H did, and then we bickered, and there you go.)

Now, I think it's important to note a few more things: B and R do not want children. Or, at least, R does not want children. She has stated, loudly and repeatedly, that she wants to concentrate on her career. She has done so in ways that has shocked and offended myself and my family, letting the interpretation be that those of us who want motherhood are somewhat lacking in our ambition.

And another thing: B and R have a perfectly adequate marriage. It's what I refer to as a Manhattan Marriage -- a little bit more business partner than life partner, but still functional. Still solid. But.

But.

But H and I have gone through Hell. We have a bond that few couples share. IF is not only a soul killer, it's a marriage crippler. And if you can make it to the other side, whatever the other side may be, that's saying something. H and I are more than husband and wife, we're more than partners. We're war buddies. We're survivors.

We know. Others may think they love each other, but we know.